Magic Fingers
by ApollosBaby
Summary: Alice Weasley had just married Draco Malfoy when she travled back in time to the 4077th MASH. Alice pretends she's a boy and lands herself in the Swamp and the nickname 'Magic Fingers' What would happen if they found the real Alice? Review PLEASE! :
1. Chapter 1

First of all, I'd like to thank you for picking my story. I hope you like it.

_Dear Draco,_

_I am very sorry about this. I didn't mean to travel back in time, sometimes I can't control my powers. I thought that would stop after I had Molly and Sammy. Apparently not. _

_I'll try to come back as soon as I can. For now if you need any help, mom will be more than happy to. Helping with her babies, babies. God, she'll go bezerk. Anyway, I'm in Korea, I think I'm in the middle of the Korean war. I just go a letter from the ministry, I'm now a captain in the USA Army, I'm stationed at the 4077th M.A.S.H. Please try to hold up until I get back._

_With love,_

_Your Alice_


	2. Chapter 2

Alice waved her wand over the letter and it disappeared, she sighed and looked around at the 4077th MASH. _It's not much_, Alice thought to herself. She sighed again and walked into the main office.

The first thing she saw was a boy around her age(Which would be 22), with glasses. He was talking on the phone, complaining about something "Ya, Sparkey. Colonel Blake wants to know why he's not here. I don't know. Wait hold on." He looked at Alice "Are you A.J Malfoy?" Alice nodded "Sparkey, never mind." He hung up the phone.

"Radar!" A man called from inside the room infrunt of them. "Where is he!"

"Follow me." The boy called Radar said. Alice nodded and followed him in the back room. "Colonel Blake, this is Captain A.J Malfoy." Radar said.

"Ah, finally decided to join us did we?" Blake said raising an eyebrow.

"So-rry," Alice snapped and sat down in a chair. Henry shrugged,

"You want any Whisky?"

Alice shrugged "Sure." She was trying her best to sound like a boy. Blake handed her a glass full of brown liquid. She nodded her thanks.

"So, A.J Malfoy." Henry said, Alice nodded. "What does 'A.J' stand for?"

"It has to stand for something?" Alice raised an eyebrow.

"I have a feeling in your case it does."

"Andrew John." Alice said.

"Andrew Malfoy?" Blake asked skeptically

"Yup. My brother's name is Abraxis," She took a swig of the Whisky "Now that's a funny name." Blake nodded.

"Alright, you'll be in the Swamp." Blake said. Alice looked at him funny.

"Radar!"

"Hawkeye and Trapper are on their way. Sir."

"Send for Hawkeye and Trapper. Good." Blake nodded. Alice had a strange feeling Radar was magic.

About five minutes later two men in bath robes came strolling in. "You called Henry?" The one with the red robe and black hair said.

"Hawkeye, Trapper. This is A.J Malfoy. Your new tent mate." Alice stood up and shook both men's hands. She could tell this was going to be a weird experience


	3. Chapter 3

"Welcome to the Swamp!" Hawkeye exclaimed, spreading his arms proudly. Alice looked around, there were four cots, in the middle of two was a homemade still.

"Nice, still." She said.

"Glad someone besides Trapper and me appreciates it." Hawkeye said and sat on the first cot.

"There's someone else here?"

"Major Frank 'Ferret Face' Burns."

"I don't like the sound of the guy." Alice shook her head.

"Hey!" Trapper exclaimed "I like you already. Martini?"

"Sure." Alice shrugged and took the drink from Trapper. She took a sip, frowned at the taste, shrugged her shoulders and finished it off.

" Ya, I like you." Trapper said nodding. Then another man, who Alice assumed was Major Burns walked in.

"Who are you?" He asked.

"A.J Malfoy. Who are you?"

"I am Major Frank Burns. You are a captain, and should salute a superior officer."

"Ya, well that's great. Hawkeye, where's my bed?"

"Oh, there." He pointed to the cot on the end of the same side he and Trapper were on.

"K," Alice went to the bed and fell down on it.

"Look what you two've done, you've already corrupted his mind before his first day was over." Frank said to Trapper and Hawkeye.

"Don't blame them Ferret Face. I was already messed up before I came here."

"Degenerates." Was all Frank could say, then he left.

"Were you seriously messed up before you came here?" Trapper asked

Alice nodded "Only Malfoy in Slytherin." She smiled at the twisting of the story(she was actually the only _Weasley _in Slytherin). Trapper and Hawkeye looked at her funny. "I went to a weird boarding school in England."

"Oh" Hawkeye exclaimed "That explains the accent."

"What did you think I was? Canadian?" Alice asked chuckling.

"What if I did?" Hawkeye asked.

"I'd have to call you stupid." Alice nodded sadly.

"In coming wounded!" Rang over the compound "Report to OR immediately."

"That's our que." Trapper said

"Now it's time to see if your any good."

"I'd better be." Alice said following the two men out of the tent and to post op.


End file.
